As you may remember, I got tired of people constantly hitting my site looking for “Olsen Twins nude” or “nude Iraqis” or “nude 10-year-old girls” or “naked little boys,” so I struck back by starting to display this message in place of a regular page for anyone that came to my site through a search engine and had “nude” or “naked” in their query:

LISTEN, YOU FREAK…

I think you’re sick… you and your “Olsen twins nude” or “naked Iraqis.” Don’t you know that you’re decreasing your karma with every search result you click on? Let me save you some trouble: you’re not going to find naked anything here. Move on and wash your brain out with soap, weirdo.

Well, imagine this: I pissed some people off! Not that I have a history of doing that, or anything. It seems a lot of folks thought I was blocking them from content that actually existed on my site. Or that I was trying to do a virtual blueballing by taking a moral high ground (hah! What’s that?). So, for your enjoyment, here’s a sampling of what I’ve received over the last month or so…

Not sure if this guy was stopped by the Olsen Twins filter, but damn is he clever. Ahem.

Typos, run-on sentences, on one of those amazing SHIFTless keyboards… pretty standard stuff here…

A relative of the previous e-mailer…

Simple and straightforward…

Heaven’s a .org. That makes sense, I guess.

The most recent and the most ironic… so much so, I’ve added my commentary in red italic text…

People will always amaze me.